A single and precise thing

2004-11-07 - 9:01 p.m.

As I was trying to figure out today's date for this entry I thought to myself, "The 7th? It can't be the 7th, Tigger's recital was on the 6th." It really doesn't seem like Tigger's recital was only yesterday. And yet, of course, it was.

So Friday morning I drove down to Stockton and met DeenPo for lunch at Sho Mi. I told her about my job and me moving and she was happy for me and sad that I was leaving. She had to leave for work and then I met the Babe. We left her car in the parking lot of my old apartment complex and drove my car down to LA. Traffic was bad, of course, and then much worse once we got to LA. We arrived at Tigger's house at about 7:30 after leaving Stockton at about 1:30. So really it took us only an hour longer than expected. She took us out for bubble tea at Quickly and then we went back to her place where we helped her prepare food for her reception and then listened while she ran through her recital. I've never seen Tigger so nervous in my life.

Saturday morning we took Tigger out to have her hair done and then drove over to her school for the recital. We got there around ten and her recital wasn't until noon. She was still really nervous. So Tigger warmed up on stage while the Babe and I set up her whole reception area. Her family flew in later. I was really nervous for her, too, although not as bad as I have been before. She played and it was wonderful. She's always wonderful, though. Afterwards, the Babe and I went with Tigger and her family to Chinatown where we had lunch at a noodle shop and then walked around a bit looking for stuff that the Babe's mom had asked her to buy there. We had bubble tea one more time and then the Babe and I set out for home. We drove pretty much straight through. We left at about quarter to five and got to Stockton at quarter to ten. I dropped the Babe off at her car, said goodbye, and drove home and was there by eleven. I fell into bed and slept like a rock, albeit on my side because my butt was so sore from sitting so long.

This morning I got up and went out to coffee with my parents. Then we went to Target and bought me some stuff I needed for my apartment. I got a shower curtain (very important), a set of glasses, and some TV trays. I spent the rest of the day packing. I'm so sick of packing. Then this evening my parents took me out to Scott's for dinner to celebrate finally getting rid of me. Scott's is a fancy schmancy seafood restaurant. I had the salmon, which was great, but I really got it for the mashed potatoes, which I love. I know, fancy schmancy seafood is wasted on me. My dad's food, I think, was filled with spicy stuff he shouldn't be eating. He tried to avoid it, but when the meal was over his mouth was burning. I really hope he doesn't get sick. Please let him not get sick.

I've been in a funk most of the day. I'm not sure why. I blame it on the packing. I think it's starting to make me sad. I've been so happy about leaving, but now it's starting to hit me. I'm leaving. For good. I'm going to move 800 miles away to a place where I know almost nobody. To a place filled with responsibility and bills. I have no doubt that I can handle it, but still.

Or maybe that's not it at all. Maybe I'm just in a funk for no reason. Whatever, it's making me sad and grouchy. I'm perfectly fine until someone talks to me. I don't want to be sad or grouchy during my last few days here. What a bummer. Hopefully I'll wake up tomorrow feeling all better. I could, possibly, be finished packing by the end of tomorrow. That would be nice.

I have this somewhat irrational fear that Flik is mad at me right now. I probably think this because of my current funky mood, but I still feel this way. Last time I talked to her we discussed politics. You may have noticed that politics is not one of my favorite topics. She brought it up, not me. She asked who I was going to vote for for president. Turns out she disagrees with my choice. I tried to tell her my logic for my decision and while I was telling her she had to go rather suddenly. It probably had nothing to do with what I was saying and everything to do with the fact that she had to go, but it felt like she left suddenly because she was upset with me. And I haven't talked to her since. This weekend she called the Babe and she called Tigger but she never called me. And when I called her she didn't answer her phone. And so I'm sad.

And today I found out that my brother's father-in-law's prostate cancer has metastasized to his bones. Now my sister-in-law wants to spend Christmas with him instead of with us (understandable, of course). And, of course, my brother wants to spend Christmas with her. So I won't be spending Christmas with them. He'll come after Christmas, but she won't. I'm wondering if I should tell my boss that there's been a change of plans and I can work Christmas after all. Then perhaps I can get Christmas off next year and we'll be back on schedule. I don't know, so the whole situation makes me sad.