Revelling in sunshine

2003-01-24 - 8:54 p.m.

"St. Louis 1, Kansas City -9, Chicago -4, Indianapolis -1, Cincinatti 3, Charleston, S.C. 13, Atlanta 4, Tallahassee, Fla. 11, Jackson, Miss. 12, Birmingham, Ala. 7, Minneapolis -12, Detroit 3." That was today's headline. Long yes, but it was also accompanied by "The Many Faces of Cold" which showed pictures of people freezing their arses off on the east coast. (Yes, to me, Kansas City is the east coast. Hey, it's my journal.) Over there do you think they run headlines that say "Sacramento 53" and show pictures of Californians revelling in sunshine?

Today was my first Friday in clinic. I liked it better than Thursdays just because there were different people there. It was still incredibly boring though. My one interruption of the day was running a journal club for the pharmacy students back in the main hospital. I had it scheduled before I knew I was switching to Friday clinics. So I ended up missing an hour of clinic. We talked about the new non-stimulating drug for ADHD, atomoxetine (Straterra). I picked the article because it was short and regarded a drug that will almost definitely be on their board exam. I thought I could possibly keep their attentions. Yeah, right. Even though I gave them the article two weeks ago, not a single one of them read it. In fact, not a single one of them even brought the article with them to our meeting. I came prepared for that and brought extra copies for everyone. I also left the conclusions off the hand out I gave them. And then I called on people. I'm turning into a big meanie.

Yesterday I met a guy. A cute guy. A cute EMT guy. And he was nice. And funny. And I met him waiting for an elevator in the hospital. He was pushing a patient on a gurney from the ER up to east 4. He didn't know how to get there. Actually, I'm not sure if he had a really horrible sense of direction or if he was just using that as an excuse to talk to me. I explained it to him and then he got off the elevator and went the wrong way so I had to chase him down and set him straight. Then I got back on the elevator and continued up to the eighth floor. And that was basically the extent of our interaction. Ha ha, am I sad or what?

Today I met a new doctor in clinic. He's actually retired and volunteering his time to the clinic. While we were in between patients he asked me, "What do you know about the toxicity of oxycodone?" This is a somewhat unusual question. I didn't really know what he meant. I said, "You mean the side effects?" He said, "No, I mean the effect." I still didn't really understand what he was driving at, so I decided to look it up in a book to buy myself some time. While I was doing that he told me the story of his dear old friend who had been diagnosed with melanoma. About three months ago they discovered that it had metastasized to his kidneys, liver, lungs, and spine and now he is in great pain. He is currently taking 80mg of oxycodone three times a day. He asked this doctor if taking all of his medicine at once would kill him. He wants to die. But this doctor doesn't want his friend to die badly. He wants to know if overdosing on oxycodone is a bad way to die. I didn't want to answer the question. Although I am opposed to suffering, being asked a question like that made me very uncomfortable. I stalled. Then someone else asked me a question and I managed to avoid answering the oxycodone question altogether. But now I feel bad. I should've handled that better. But how? I don't know. I don't know.

But now, let's turn our attention to .

1. What is one thing you don't like about your body?

You mean other than the fact that I'm mishapen? I've always felt like I look like to two different people stuck together. From the bellybutton down I'm a big fat girl, with a big paunch and massively jelly-like thighs. From the bellybutton up there's hardly a speck of fat on me. You can see my top four abs, my ribs stick out, my chest is ironing board flat, and you can see all the muscles in my shoulders and back. Which is why when I go to the gym I only run, no weightlifting for me. But other than being mishapen, I'm completely happy with my body. :)

2. What's are two things you love about your body?

I've always been a tad vain about my eyes. And I like being tall. I just wish so many guys weren't so short.

3. What are three things you want to change about your home?

I'd like to change which neighborhood it is in, the color of the carpet, and the ant problem.

4. What four books would you like to read this year?

That is a totally insane question. Four? There are millions of books I'd like to read. And then I'd like to learn another language or two and read some more books.

5. What five promises have you kept to yourself?

I don't make promises I don't intend to keep.