I am innocent and I am poison

2005-08-07 - 5:20 p.m.

"Some people drink, some take drugs, I take two deep breaths."

I just got back from date two with guy two. This time he came over to my neck of the woods. I had him come to my apartment building just because I was too lazy to think of a better place to meet, but I didn't show him my actual apartment. I met him out front. We walked down to Pacific Place and had lunch at a restaurant called Mexico. We sat out on the patio and our conversation was frequently interrupted by the noise from the Blue Angels who have been doing shows over Lake Washington for the past three days. After lunch we had time so we walked down to the waterfront. We walked through Pike Street Market and down to Pier 66 (which was unfortunately gated off for security reasons because there's a cruise ship docked there at the moment). Then we walked back up to the ACT Theatre where I have season tickets and we saw "The Night of the Iguana" by Tennessee Williams. After the play I pretty much just walked him back to my place and said goodbye.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I think maybe I will be a spinster forever. Maybe I just don't like people enough. Maybe I just don't know what I want. I don't know.

So hanging out with him was nice. He's pleasant and easy to talk to. Yes, he's still a bit dopey looking, but there's nothing else particularly wrong with him. And yes, I enjoyed spending time with him. But by the end of the date, I was very ready to spend some time by myself. As we were leaving the show it occured to me that we could walk around some more or hang out somewhere and have dinner together too, but I didn't suggest anything of the sort because I just didn't want to. Maybe I'm just tired.

Anyway, after saying goodbye I hugged him. Mostly because he looked like he wanted me to and I thought it would be awkward not to. Good reason, eh? Plus, he's nice. But then he held on much longer that I would've liked. And when I tried to pull away he kissed me. I managed to keep that to a closed-mouth peck, but he still had ahold of me so he hugged me some more. I finally broke away from that and said goodbye again and started to walk away but he still had ahold of my hand. I think I'm making all of this sound much worse than it actually was (or maybe I'm not, I don't know), it all lasted maybe 20 seconds total. So there, I was a bit turned off by that. I'm such a dork.

Two days ago, Friday morning, I went out with the third guy. We ended up just meeting at a Starbucks and chatting over coffee. This guy is, once again, really nice, and I think he's the best looking, at least in the face, of the three guys I seem to somehow be dating. He's very blonde, tall, and sorta big. I really liked him. We talked for nearly two hours and it didn't seem like that much time had gone by at all. I wanted to come here and write about it afterwards, but I ended up having to rush off to work right away because we talked longer than I had thought we would. I'd have to say this guy's biggest issues that come immediately to mind are possible intelligence issues and his lack of a job. But he's in the process of getting a new job and I did the "between jobs" thing for a significant chunk of time there, so I can't really complain too much about that. We're planning on going out again tomorrow night, probably to see a movie.

Guy number one is currently in England on a business trip. I went out with him last Wednesday. We went to see some Shakespeare in the Park up in Shoreline. They did Twelfth Night and I really enjoyed it. I've pretty much decided that guy number one is not a viable romantic option, though. I don't feel physically attracted to him and I don't feel up to dealing with his particular brand of quirks. Now, how to tell him this? Oh, speaking of quirks, while we were looking at the program for Twelfth Night, we came across an ad for Utilikilts. He was looking at the picture of some macho guy wearing a leather skirt with pockets when I asked him if he would wear one. He told me that that would be a problem because (and this is a direct quote) "among other things, I'm not a fan of underwear." Oh my god.

So anyway, I didn't mean to make this an entry entirely about guys. I'm feeling kind of depressed for some reason, though. I've been drooling over a pair of shoes I saw recently in an REI catalogue. The biggest problem with them is of course they're from REI so they're expensive. What do you think, should I splurge and go down and buy myself a pair?