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It wasn't my hiking boots in the tele box
2005-08-18 - 1:56 p.m.
The thing about time is that it won't go by when you're bored silly. You can't just space out and wait for quitting time to roll around because it never will. At least this is what I've noticed lately. But if you're working, time goes smoothly enough. I think there's a moral to this story somewhere...
It happened for the first time today. Yes, a code was called while I was in the bathroom. There are no speakers in that particular bathroom so it was kind of hard to hear what room it was in. I had to stop tinkling mid-stream to hear it. And it turned out to be on my floor! Luckily, I was still able to make it to the code before any of the other pharmacists so nobody knew I was a tad slow to respond. And also luckily, it wasn't a real code. The patient stood up too quickly, passed out, and fell down. I think that would be so freaky to pass out in a quiet little hospital room and then come to in a room swarming with doctors and other healthcare personnel all looking straight at you.
Oh, speaking of passing out, one of the medical residents on my team is from Japan. Her English is actually very good, but occasionally she has little slip ups. For example, when telling us about one of her patients who fainted briefly she told us, "He passed away for a few seconds." It was so funny. Passed out, passed away, such a small but important difference! And she also has a fairly thick accent. The attending asked her if she thought a patient had a particular condition. She thought about it for a moment and then said, "Well...he has risk factors..." Only that's not what we heard. What we heard was, "Well...he is fucked up..." Oh man, who knew rounds could be so entertaining?I'm starting to get a bit nervous for this weekend. I know that's completely silly, but there it is. It has become apparent that Lolo has not invited anyone else to go with us on our little hiking outing, and at this point it seems a bit late to be inviting people. So it looks like it's going to be just the two of us. It has also, of course, occured to me that I'm blowing this whole thing out of proportion. It's just two co-workers going for a hike, after all. But for some reason it doesn't feel that way. I'm a little scared that I'll bore him to tears. And I'm a little scared that I won't, actually. What if this whole thing isn't my imagination? What if he really does like me (I have no idea why that would be, but let's just pretend here)? We're co-workers after all. Do I want to be involved with a co-worker? Um...no, not particularly. But on the other hand...I don't think I'd really let that stand in the way if we actually end up having chemistry. Chemistry is so rare. But most likely I'm totally jumping the gun and this is absolutely nothing. I mean, this is friends. Which is fine, really. Friends is good. Often when I like someone (and I believe I mentioned this before), I tend to totally ignore them. Lolo has been ignoring me at work since I started here 9 months ago. I just figured that was because I'm a big dork and not really worth paying attention to anyway, but then recently we've been e-mailing plans for this weekend and he seems very friendly in the e-mail but he still ignores me at work. So I'm taking this as an indication that he likes me. Today I was eating lunch in the break room (something I hate doing but I do it when I'm working clinical shifts so that I can be around to answer my pager and go to codes and whatnot) when he came in to drop off his stuff. I was facing the door and I looked up and watched him come in, put down his pack, and go right back out. Admittedly he was a tad late and therefore in a hurry and also admittedly I didn't say anything, but I did look up and allow making eye contact to be very easy and it wouldn't have taken too long just to smile and say hey. Woo, there I go way overanalyzing everything!
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OK, so I wrote the above while I was at work this afternoon. I think I need to stop thinking about Lolo. How can it be that I thought about him almost not at all for 9 months and now suddenly I'm becoming a little obsessed? It all started with the hike to Mailbox Peak. He took a picture of me there...and I don't know, for some reason it made me think that maybe he actually had some interest in me. But then nothing happened until this weekend we worked alone together and then he asked me to go hiking with him...and here we are. In all honesty, I don't even know if he has a girlfriend. He's never mentioned having one, but that doesn't mean he doesn't. For all I know he's gay even!
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